Warning: If you are a Male, you may not want to read this… unless you don’t care… But I warned you
It’s always a little scary putting out your thoughts, feelings, emotions and personal stuff out on the whole world wide web, but if there is a chance that it can help someone else, then I believe it is all worth it!
That’s one of the reasons I started this blog, to encourage, inspire and give hope to anyone who needs it.
Well, here we go! It’s time to get real.
I’m just going to come on out and say it. I have PCOS. Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome. What a long name huh? Basically, what this means is my body just doesn’t work properly. At all. As a woman, the messages inside that my body sends to all the departments just get jumbled up and miss-communicated. It’s like going to the DMV on a busy day. Nothing gets the done the way it’s supposed to and it usually always end up in tears.
It’s starts off with a hormone imbalance. My body doesn’t produce enough of the right hormones which means, I don’t ovulate normally, I can’t process sugars correctly, my body produces insulin but doesn’t use it (what a waste right?), my body loves to hold onto weight (it’s separation anxiety at it’s worst) and a whole bunch of other awkward and un-fun things. It is just a huge bummer! The biggest downside and most down heartening side effect is infertility. Boom. There it is.
The problem with PCOS is there is no gauge. Not everyone with PCOS looks the same, has the same symptoms, and it can be easily misdiagnosed. It took several years before a doctor found out what was wrong. I was diagnosed with several different things and at one time was taking up to 30 pills a day. You should have seen my pill box; it was massive! No one even really knows what causes PCOS and it can be so frustrating.
Most of the symptoms are just superficial at best, but can be hard as a woman to deal with. For me, it is the looming possibility of being infertile. While you can’t cure PCOS, you can treat it. The best way to describe PCOS to others for me is telling them my body acts like it has Type 2 Diabetes, just with some added bumps a long the way.
But here is the good news. I am not alone, nor do I need to fear the future. If you had asked me a couple of years ago if I would be able to cope with this news, I probably would have said no. But here’s where things changed down the road. I realized I am not alone in this. PCOS is actually very common; a lot of women have PCOS (I think it’s about 30 % of all women) and are huge supporters of each other. While this diagnosis is hard to swallow, it is not the end of the world. There are several ways to overcome PCOS, medication, diet, exercise, and eating hormone free food.
And most of all, I have faith. I believe that God will work in whatever His will is. While it is hard for me to grasp at the possibility of being infertile, I know that if we are meant to have children we will. We will try our hardest (wink, wink) and if we have to, we will do IVF but I am also prepared to let God be the decider. After all, I am totally ok with adoption because, well you can read all about that here. And I know that if I need to talk to someone about infertility, I will have the best mentor, my mom.
So my sweet friends, if you have PCOS or know someone else who does, you/they are no alone! It doesn’t have to be so scary and if you ever need to chat, I got your back! I will even bring the tissues, cause girl, we’re gonna cry it out! (Did I mention that being extremely emotional was a side effect? Sorry I’m no sorry about always crying during Hallmark commercials).